Miscellaneous

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Miscellaneous

The Boundaries of Customer Service

We’re guessing since hanging up your dog pro shingle you’ve had occasion to question the “customer is always right” adage. Yet we’ve worked with enough dog pros to know that too many take good customer service a little too far—often bending over backwards for clients to the breaking point. Customer service boundaries

We understand the desire to grow your business. Making compromises on your services and policies—or letting clients dictate them—may seem like a good way to get work and cultivate client loyalty, but making too many concessions means putting the leash in your clients’ hands, and Miffy’s rhinestone collar around your own neck.

Three common ways dog pros give too much:

Scheduling
Do you let your clients dictate your hours? Doing so likely means scheduling inefficiencies that make your work more difficult and time consuming than need be.

Dog trainers’ work days can easily stretch on too long when planning appointments around every client’s ideal schedule. The wasted time between car treks all over town could be better spent marketing your business, finding new clients, or spending quality time with loved ones.

It’s easy to get caught up in the day-to-day tasks of working in your business. Controlling your business’ scheduling through carefully thought-through policies protects the time you need to work on the business, too—the only way to get ahead.

Cancellations
Letting clients cancel at will is not customer service; it’s a lack of good business policy. And if you can’t stay in business because you’re losing tens of thousands of dollars a year to cancellations (do the math—the numbers will likely shock you), your good customer service won’t mean anything, certainly not to the dogs you’ve worked so hard to help.

Most dog pros use some version of asking for a certain number of hours’ or days’ notice. But for dog pros, time equals money, and most dog services aren’t set up to easily fill vacancies. Those last-minute cancellations can be nearly impossible to fill. Make sure you choose an amount of time for your cancellation policy that actually allows you to fill the slot.

For classes, you’re better off not allowing cancellations at all. Your clients should be paying for one of a finite number of spaces. We particularly recommend this approach for small businesses offering clients the advantage of personalized attention, small groups, and high staff-to-dog ratios.

Services
Letting clients dictate your services—how many training sessions they need, how long a consult runs for — is also not customer service. It’s a lack of service definition, a lack of confidence in deciding what’s best for dogs and insisting on it.

For example, offering various sized training packages to choose from hands clients a decision they are not qualified to make. It’s up to you to set yourself, your clients, and their dogs up for success by selling them the amount of training that will give them the best chance of meeting their goals.

Though it reduces some flexibility, you, your clients, and the dogs are all better served by strong policies designed to keep you in business for the long haul.

Cultivating Respect
Respect is contagious. Cultivate respect for your own business, your time, and your policies, and clients will respond favorably. During initial meetings, communicate your scheduling and cancellation policies clearly, and without apology. This shows clients that you respect yourself enough to charge for the time they are missing and that your time is valuable. Use psychology to your advantage; for example, offering set appointment hours implies to the client that you are busy, and that others value your time and expertise.

For some of us, of course, this is easier said than done. If self-assurance isn’t your forte, we suggest a fake-it-till-you-make-it attitude. Imagine that confident peer you’ve always respected, and model yourself accordingly. A few repetitions later, you might be surprised at the results.

When faced with difficult clients who continually question your policies or demand special treatment, we suggest an honest appraisal of their worth to your business. Bending over backwards to please them means giving abrasive clients an unfair advantage. And dealing with challenging clients often effects how we feel about our work. Time spent catering to the whims of difficult clients might be better spent looking for clients who respect you and appreciate the service you provide.

What is customer service?
We don’t want to be misunderstood. Good customer service matters—a lot. But rather than handing over the keys or bending until you break, simply take good care of people. Return phone calls and emails in a timely manner. Greet your clients with genuine warmth and enthusiasm. Make an effort to remember their names and ask them questions about their lives. In short, strive to build relationships with your clients.

Be reliable. Do what you say you’ll do, and do it on time. Do what you do better than anyone else; exceed your clients’ expectations. In short, work hard to improve your clients’ lives with their dogs, and each dog’s welfare – the reason you hung up your shingle in the first place.

We help trainers develop strong policies and great customer service as part of our THRIVE! curriculum. Take a look. 

Handling Unhappy Clients While Sticking To Your Policies

Pleasing an unhappy dog often comes down to simple things. Taking out a leash. Saying the word, “W-A-L-K.” Bologna. Pleasing unhappy clients, however, can prove more complicated, and even dog pros with the best customer service skills find that they can’t please all the people all the time. Here are a few steps to cut down on client complaints, and suggestions for what to do when confronted by an unhappy client.

Finger selecting an unhappy face icon on a screen with three options including happy, neutral, and disappointed.An Ounce Or Two Of Prevention
Client complaints often result from confusion over your policies, so take preventative measures that will save you future headaches:

  • Know your policies inside and out, including the purpose and importance of each one. A firm grasp on your own policies allows you to communicate them to clients without nervousness or hesitation.
  • Decide now which exceptions to which policies you’ll allow. If a client cancels at the last minute, under what conditions will you waive the standard fee? Sickness? Death in the family? Only when you can fill that last-minute spot with another client? How many cancellations per client will you forgive?
  • Don’t just hand a policy sheet to the client. Go over the policies multiple times, in the contract (“Please initial each one”), in your class confirmation email, or during phone registration: “Do these drop-off times work for you?”
  • If a client tries to cancel last-minute, contact her and reiterate the policy. “Before I cancel this appointment for you, a quick reminder on our cancellation policy: You’ll still be charged for the hour, so are you sure you can’t make this time work?” Most clients will reconsider when they realize you actually enforce your policies.
  • Trainers may encounter clients with unrealistic expectations for their dog’s progress. Let clients know ahead of time what they can reasonably expect and when. If they seem frustrated, give them something to look forward to by gently turning their focus to the goals for the next session. Walkers and sitters may need to explain what’s included in the service (for example, an hour of activity with five or fewer dogs) and what isn’t (such as running errands).
  • Head off complaints before they happen. Solicit feedback or provide your clients with surveys so you know what’s working and where there’s room for improvement.

Face To Face
It may be the best medicine, but prevention is no cure-all. If a complaint comes despite your best efforts, try these four steps:

1.  Remain calm. This first step is often the hardest. It’s natural to feel defensive, but put that aside and just listen. For clarity’s sake, restate the client’s complaint so you both understand the nature of the problem. “If I understand you correctly, you’re upset that you can’t pick up your dog at 8 p.m.?”

2.  Use a little empathy. Imagine the situation from the client’s point of view. Some clients have no problem with confrontation, but for others, registering a complaint takes courage and it doesn’t hurt to acknowledge their feelings. “I can see why you’re angry/ frustrated/ concerned…”

3.  Refer back to your policies. If the complaint relates to a policy, take a moment to revisit the why behind it. For example, “I understand how this policy feels inconvenient, but let me explain why we do it this way and maybe that will help…”

4.  If appropriate, make an exception. If it feels right, see what you can offer the client within the limits of your policy, or within the exceptions to the policy you’ve already determined. Be careful here. Don’t rush to offer an exception that isn’t warranted. And never compromise on safety. When safety is at stake, restate the reasons behind your policies: “We require for everyone’s safety that dogs with a history of biting wear muzzles,” for example, or, “The drop-off times greatly limit the length of time the dogs are excited and the staff is distracted.” Emphasize the welfare of their dogs and most clients will see reason.

Real-Life Troubles In An Online World
Many clients find feedback easier to give online, where everyone, including your mother and various potential clients, can see it. We know you’re busy, but it pays to do regular online monitoring. Set Google alerts and also schedule a Google search on your business name into your weekly tasks to stay on top of your virtual reputation.

Your training in positive reinforcement methods work here, too. Thank the clients who leave you the wildest praise. But if you stumble across a complaint, tread carefully. The first step of face-to-face conflict applies here as well: remain calm. If you feel angry or defensive, step away from the computer. Take your dog for a walk. Your dog and your future conscience will thank you.

Leaving a brief, conciliatory public comment shows the client and other observers that you’re paying attention. If there’s been a simple factual error (your hours of business were misunderstood, for example) you can relay the fact with diplomacy. For other complaints it may be best to ask the client to contact you directly.

Many sites allow you to contact the customer via private message: “I was sorry to hear of your dissatisfaction with my service and I would love the opportunity to make things right.” Showing genuine concern can sometimes lead to a revised review. But clients can detect even the smallest hint of hostility, condescension, or insincerity, so ask a spouse, friend, or trusted dog pro peer (the more impartial, the better) to read your message before hitting send.

Bad Apples And Teachable Moments
Let’s face it – some clients are impossible. We’re talking about the chronically complaining, eternally unsatisfied type, and if your efforts are met with continued resistance, it may be time to cut ties. One unhappy customer can seriously affect your mood and your work, and that person simply isn’t worth the stress. The time you waste trying to placate them could be better spent finding and building new client relationships.

When dealing with this type, keep the focus on yourself. “We’re just not able to meet your needs,” works better than, “You’re never satisfied.” Better yet, if you know of a local dog pro whose policies would make for a better fit, a referral can lessen the sting.

If you find multiple clients registering the same policy complaint, however, it may be time to reevaluate your policies or, often the culprit, how you communicate your policies. (You may also need to take a look at whether you’re attracting the right clients for your service.) Remaining open to feedback and fixing recurring problems will lead to happier clients—and a happier you.

Given the complexities of human beings, it’s no wonder we sometimes prefer the company of dogs. It would be nice if a piece of bologna solved all conflicts, but with clear policies, empathy, and a cool head, you can handle even the toughest client complaints.

Want help designing successful dog pro policies for your business?
Take our dogbiz University on-demand course Money Matters: Pricing, Policies, & Packages.

Finding the Courage to Succeed

Running a small business is scary. It’s a lot of great things, too—freedom and control over your schedule, who you work with, and how you work, just to name a few. But it’s also scary. There’s a lot of uncertainty and a lot of responsibility. For most dog pros, owning a business also requires stepping outside your comfort zone. Repeatedly.

Young girl and dog both wearing red capes.Here’s the cool thing, though: You’ve already proven your courage. You’ve already proven your ability to face down fear just by opening your dog business. If you’re reading this while still in the contemplation stage, you’re already more courageous than most. The reality is that few people choose to follow their passion even a step or two down the path.

So if you’re reading this you probably already know the value of overriding fear, doubt, and self-doubt. You’ve done it before. With that self-knowledge in mind, are there areas of your business (whether in existence or in process) that could benefit from a little fearlessness right now? Because maximizing your success could be as simple as tapping into the courage you already possess.

Find the courage to offer the best services for dogs.
Dog trainers, don’t let your fear of losing the sale or being told you’re too expensive keep you from packaging and selling the amount of training you know is necessary to meet a training goal. Selling less training than is needed sets you, the client, and the dog up for failure. You undersell to avoid failure, but the reality is that underselling all but ensures it. As a dog training professional, be fearless and bold in your insistence about what you know to be necessary.

Dog walkers and pet sitters, don’t offer walks or visits that you don’t feel ethical about providing. It’s frustrating to wrap up a dog walk after 20 minutes, knowing it wasn’t adequate to exercise a young, active dog. And if you feel guilty leaving a dog whose people are away after a 15-minute visit, drop that sitting service model in favor of one you can feel good about.

Find the courage to create and insist on good policies.
Dog trainers, you know the importance of consistency for training results. Your cancellation policy should reflect that importance. Be bold. Make it difficult for clients to cancel. It’s not only in your financial interest—it’s in their interest as well and, most importantly, better serves the dogs.

Dog walkers and dog daycares, your very livelihood depends on avoiding cancellations and developing strong policies governing how clients must use your services. Allowing drop-ins and cancellations means the stress of running a business with a constantly fluctuating income. It means more stress for the dogs, too, leading to more incidents and behavior issues, which in turn causes stress for your clients. Insisting on good policies draws the best clients and provides you financial stability.

Will there be potential clients who pass your walking or daycare business over because of your policies? Probably a few. But there’s no need to fear this. When you have the right policies, you won’t need those folks. (And you’ll be happier without them, too.)

Find the courage to charge what you’re worth
Having the best rates is another way to draw the best clients. (This doesn’t necessarily mean drawing the wealthiest clients, contrary to popular misconception. It means drawing the most dedicated clients.) Set down your fear of charging more. Someone will always be there to tell you you’re too expensive, no matter whether you charge at the bottom or the top of your local scale. You cannot avoid that.

What you can avoid is being underpaid, living on the financial edge, and feeling undervalued. What you can avoid is drawing the bargain hunters who chose you because you’re cheap, instead of choosing you because they love what you do and how you do it. The latter kind of client is likely to pass you by because you’re cheap—they’ll assume you aren’t good enough for their dog. That’s too bad because those are the loyal clients you really want.

If you’re not charging at the top of your local scale, it’s time to take bold action to raise your rates. Just starting out? Start at the top from the very beginning; no need to make this common mistake.

Find the courage to say no.
As an industry, we’re terrible at this. We’re a profession of helpers, of altruists, of dog lovers. We’re just nice people. Our commitment to positive reinforcement and kindness and service runs so deep that we feel guilty telling anyone no about anything.

Problem is, we don’t have any more hours in the day than anyone else. So we have to get better at identifying when we must say no in order to do our best work. If we don’t learn to say no, we ultimately rob ourselves of the ability to work on our core mission of helping the most dogs possible. If you burn out, you will touch fewer dogs’ lives. Period.

In any decision you make, always ask yourself this question: Does this opportunity allow me to pursue my central work better than whatever will get squeezed out to make room for it? Also, make sure you don’t risk burning out by not leaving enough time for yourself, your family, and your own dogs.

And when it comes to setting down your fear to say no, remember that there’s no point having good policies if you don’t enforce them. Remember that your policies serve a purpose—that purpose will help you stand strong when the answer should be no.

Find the courage to market yourself.
You must face down marketing fear. If you’re to help the most number of dogs possible in your career you must summon the courage to put yourself out there. To let people know what you do. To offer your services. To risk rejection. The fear of rejection holds too many dog pros back from the success they could enjoy, and the good they could do.

Remember this: You don’t have to take being told no as a personal rejection.

And this: Always remember you’re doing it for the dogs.

And this: There are many, many ways to market your business. You’re in charge. You can choose the strategies that are comfortable for you and avoid those that make your stomach hurt and your palms sweat. What’s important is to take action of some kind and build from there.

Never fear failure.
For the courageous, failure is only a momentary sting on the path to success. And the best antidote to fear is action. We see it in our THRIVE! program and our business consulting work over and over. At dogbiz we have the tremendous honor of working with dog pros so dedicated to improving the lives of dogs that they’re willing to push through their fears.

It’s not always easy—and sometimes it takes a while to build the momentum to take bold action, whether it’s to finally launch that website and “make it official,” or to take the next step required to push an existing business to the next level. But in the end, these dog pros take a deep breath and take the plunge.

What do they find? That fear is replaced by relief, exhilaration, a sense of accomplishment, and growing confidence. And the end result? Ultimately, greater success—both financially and in serving dogs and their people.

 

Are you an R+ dog trainer tired of pushing through the fear on your own? Join THRIVE! and benefit from a supportive community of R+ trainers who amplify each other’s courage.

Business Smarts: What Dog Pros Need To Know

We all know the importance of being dog smart—of keeping up-to-date on solid, scientific knowledge of dogs and dog behavior. Not only is knowing dogs critical to our success, whether we’re training, walking, or otherwise caring for them, it’s also critical to taking responsible, professional care of these creatures we all love.

But what about the importance of business smarts? If loving and working with dogs is how you make your living (or how you dream about and plan to do so), developing business smarts is just as important. After all, without business smarts you have far fewer opportunities to put your dog smarts to good use.

So what are the basics that make up dog business smarts? What do you need to know to be successful as a dog pro?

How To Value Yourself
Too many dog professionals set their rates without true strategy—and the result is usually to undervalue themselves.

Most dog trainers, dog walkers, dog daycares, and the like set rates based either on the lemming strategy, the “No one will pay that” strategy (also known as the “I couldn’t charge that” strategy), or a combination of both. The lemming strategy consists of looking up other local dog pros’ rates and copying them. The problem with this approach is that most businesses copied haven’t set rates with good strategy, either, so we perpetuate an industry where our services are undervalued.

The “No one will pay that” or “I couldn’t charge that” approach to rate setting simply projects our insecurities onto our clients, and turns those insecurities into a self-fulfilling prophecy. Because serious dog owners look for the best trainers, walkers, daycares, etc. in their area, they’ll assume the cheaper businesses aren’t the best and look right past dog pros who are afraid to charge their worth. (If you doubt this, just look at the traditional compulsion trainers in your area. Most likely they charge far more than educated, reputable positive reinforcement trainers. Which group has the most businesses in your community?)

One key to dog pro business success is setting your rates with strategy, both so that you make what you actually need to stay in business and live a financially safe and stable life, and so that you draw the clients who are the right match for you and your services.

How To Protect Yourself—Legal Protection
Protecting your business has two central components. The first is protecting yourself legally with solid professional service contracts, a professional insurance policy, and if you and your CPA feel it’s warranted, by organizing as a limited liability company or LLC. Though the last decade has seen much improvement, too many dog lovers still provide services without these steps in place, putting themselves at personal liability risk and also contributing to the perception of dog pros as hobbyists rather than professionals.

We also see too many dog pros seeking to cut corners and save costs in this arena. It’s common, for example, to see trainers and walkers post on online forums asking if others have service contracts they’re willing to share. This is a potentially dangerous practice in an industry known for its lack of business acumen and rigor. It’s also common to see forum conversations about who offers the cheapest liability insurance, instead of asking the question that really matters: Who offers the best?

If you are serious about running a successful professional business and making your living as a dog pro, cutting corners on your business foundation undermines that professionalism and your business’ solidity.

How To Protect Yourself—Policies
The other component of protecting yourself is setting—and enforcing—strong policies. Many dog pros either do not set policies, or set them by copying others. The common policy approaches in our industry are generally not worth copying, as they do not do the job they’re meant to do. And then there’s the issue of enforcing policies, which so many of us are uncomfortable doing, and so simply do not.

Your policies should do several jobs for you. They should protect your revenue by guarding against cancellations and by requiring clients to use your services as intended. For example, dog walkers and dog daycares often struggle with wildly inconsistent income from month to month due to cancellations as well as clients using the service on an as-needed instead of regular, consistent basis. The right policies remove this stress, putting the business on safe financial footing.

Good policies don’t just protect and stabilize your income. They also set clients up for success. For example, clients are much more likely to see the impact of your dog walking service if their dogs are getting regular exercise with you instead of joining you intermittently. And dog training clients will enjoy much stronger results if training is consistent—i.e., if they aren’t losing ground due to cancelled training sessions.

Finally, setting, explaining, and enforcing smart policies encourages clients to respect you as a professional service provider and expert in your field, rather than merely a dog lover-turned-hobbyist. Not only do you deserve this, establishing such rapport with your clients will also mean fewer client service conflicts, and clients who are much quicker to respond to your requests, whether to pay an invoice or to take important action regarding their dogs’ health, behavioral wellness, or emotional well-being.

How To Market Yourself
This is such an area of discomfort for most R+ dog pros that we simply don’t do much of it. And what we do generally isn’t particularly effective. Between this and the rate and policy issues we struggle with, it’s no wonder there’s a pervasive (but entirely untrue) perception that you can’t make a good living as a dog professional.

Most dog pros are altruistic by nature rather an entrepreneurial, and the idea of selling ourselves feels tacky and distasteful. Add in the human fear of rejection and it can be a tall order to get a dog trainer or dog walker to throw themselves into serious marketing efforts.

But without marketing there are precious few dogs to serve. The good news: There are approaches to marketing in our industry that are entirely consistent with an authentic desire to do good for dogs and their people. These ways of marketing focus on community education rather than self-aggrandizement, and on doing for others instead of asking for favors.

Learning these approaches to marketing, along with a solid understanding of the principles of marketing, including branding, marketing messages, and message delivery, are the difference between the stress of waiting for inquiries and the stress of too much business. (Which problem would you rather have?)

How To Pace Yourself
Most dog pros are driven by their passion for dogs. That passion generally starts at home, with our own four-legged companions. Which is why it’s such a tragedy when dog pros—we see this especially among dog trainers—wake up one day to realize they don’t have the time they want with their own dogs.

Then there are the other goals you may have had in starting a business—the freedom, the ability to spend more time with family or friends or on hobbies and other interests. So many of the pre-consulting questionnaires we receive share frustrations and stress around impossible schedules, lack of downtime and regular time off, years without a break or vacation, and the guilt around not having more time and energy for one’s own four-legged best friends.

None of the rest of this matters—the rates, the policies, the marketing—if you don’t create a sustainable business and existence. Learning efficient business systems and time management strategies is critical to the longevity of your business, which is critical to helping as many dogs over as long a career as possible.

How To Set Yourself—and Your Clients & The Dogs—Up For Success
And all of this—the rates, policies, marketing, and scheduling—must be predicated on what it is you actually do for clients and dogs, and how you package and deliver those services. Dog training services can be provided in all sorts of ways, as can dog walking or dog daycare or pet sitting or boarding.

Take private training as just one example. There are the high-level questions, such as whether to teach clients how to train their dog or whether you’ll do the training for them via day training or board & train. But there are so many levels below this. How will you package your services, and will those packages be customized or pre-set? What will your pre-set packages be designed to address—which types of situations, behaviors, dogs, clients? What will the support component of your packages look like? Will you hybridize and combine services, such as a program combining private training and a group class for leash reactivity, or a weekend socialization/proofing field trip class for your private puppy training or puppy day school clients?

The options are endless, and what you choose to offer will have significant impact on which dog owners—and how many—take you up on those offers. Too many trainers copy what others are doing instead of learning how to assess their community and make strategic choices to set themselves up for success.

Getting Business Smart
While it may never be as exciting as learning dog smarts (or as wriggly and slobbery), deliberately building your dog business smarts is every bit as important if your goal is make your living helping as many dogs as possible.

Just as responsible dog professionals do not leave their dog smarts to experience alone and the vagaries of conventional wisdom, instead seeking quality education through reputable schools for dog trainers, dog walkers, etc., it is equally important to seek quality dog business education.

 

Ready to cultivate your dog biz smarts?

Take a look at our services and toolkits to kickstart your dog training aspirations.

Breaking Up With Clients Is Hard To Do

The old song says that breaking up is hard to do. If you’ve ever had to part ways with a client, you know that it’s true. So true, in fact, that dog pros often wait far too long to let challenging clients go, choosing to live with ongoing stress rather than face the uncomfortable moment of truth. If you’re living with difficult clients (human or dog), here are some guidelines for knowing when to part ways—and how to do it.Breaking up with a client

Admitting the honeymoon is over.
Just as in a romantic relationship, you sometimes don’t know it’s a bad fit until the first argument or moment of crisis. Other times you can tell right from the first date. Either way, it’s often hard to do what we know needs doing. Conflict avoidance is a powerful force and can lead to all sorts of rationalizations. It’ll get better. I can live with this. It’s not that bad. I really like his dog. But even as we make the excuses we know it’s inevitable: This will end in tears.

Alright, that may be a bit dramatic. But the point is the same: It doesn’t pay to put off the break up. Here’s how to know when it’s time:

A client is causing you ongoing low-level stress or periods of intense stress. This can come in many forms. Repeatedly complaining about or questioning policies, or asking for exceptions or special treatment. Requiring an inordinate amount of time via email, text, or phone. Abusive treatment of you or staff. Longevity is key for your livelihood and ability to help the most dogs possible. And longevity requires enjoyment of the work. If a client is affecting your love of the job—or that of your employees—it’s time to recognize the relationship isn’t a good fit.

A dog is causing you or other dogs ongoing low-level stress or periods of intense stress. Sometimes it’s the canine client who’s the issue, rather than their human. This is particularly hard, as our instinct is to give dogs many second chances. Here’s a litmus test to know when it really is time to make the call: If, when a particular dog is not on the daycare floor or in a walking rotation, you notice that you, your staff, or the other dogs better enjoy their day, it’s time. No matter how much you want to help the dog in question, you are better served by taking care of yourself and your staff—and you are obligated to take care of the other dogs.

Non-compliance on health or behavior issues. Whether you’re a dog trainer, dog walker, or daycare operator, it’s important that clients respect your expertise by responding to requests regarding their dog’s physical and behavioral well being. Trainers, you can’t achieve successful case resolution without client compliance. Walkers and daycares, your job is to keep dogs safe and happy. A client who ignores a request to seek training or a suggestion for veterinary care is not an active partner in the relationship. In short, if clients impede your ability to do right by dogs, it’s time to call it quits.

It’s not you, it’s me.
It’s one thing to know the end has come, another to know how to make the break. Most of us in the R+ world tend toward conflict avoidance, and it never feels good to hurt another’s feelings or cause stress or disappointment. The trick, in most cases, is the well-worn “It’s not you, it’s me” strategy. While a love interest might see right through this ruse, done well it’s a bit easier to pull off with a client whose time has come. The idea is to focus on your or your business’ inability to fulfill the client’s or the dog’s needs, rather than the issues you’re having with either.

The key to delivering a good breakup speech is just the right mix of empathy and firmness. You want to be kind and gentle, but leave no mistake that the decision has been made. This is a breakup, not a separation—be sure not to leave the door open for any hopeful second chances. If you’re feeling nervous or unsure going into one of these conversations, write a script and practice it. You might even do some role play with a friend, co-worker, or partner at home.

Try a variation of one of these scripts:

I’ve put this conversation off a long time because I so love Charlie, but the truth is we’re just not the right fit for him. Charlie has so much exuberance and our [daycare or walking] group just isn’t the right mix of dogs to give him the best experience every day. Charlie needs some younger dogs ready to romp and play in his style. [Or: Charlie would get so much more from a dedicated dog walker who can provide him undivided attention and see that he gets the exercise he really needs.]

We’re going to miss him terribly, but I think he and you will both be much happier, particularly when you see the impact a higher level of exercise can have on behavior at home. So let’s set [a day two weeks out] as Charlie’s last day with us to give you some time to find a better situation for him. [Optional:] I’ve got a list of referrals for you here.

The first paragraph sets out the rationale. Note that the focus is on the business’ ability to meet the client’s and dog’s needs, not whether this was a difficult client situation or an issue with Charlie’s behavior. Notice also that the last paragraph leaves no room for misunderstanding—the decision has been made.

A note about referrals: It won’t be appropriate to provide a referral in all cases. For example, you won’t want to refer a dog you know to be inappropriate for daycare to another daycare, unless you think it’s a different enough setup to work for him. And don’t refer truly challenging clients to dog pro colleagues—that’s just bad karma. If you don’t have anyone you feel comfortable referring to, that’s fine. The dog is ultimately the client’s responsibility and it’s up to them to find appropriate care. Don’t let a lack of good referral sources in your area guilt you into keeping a dog or client who isn’t a good fit.

My job is to give you and Fido the best chance of reaching your training goals, and I’m concerned I’m not going to be able to do so. I can see you’re uncomfortable with [or don’t have time for] the approach [or instructions or homework or training plan, etc.] that I’m advocating, and without us being on the same page we’re not likely to see results. To give each client and dog my best effort I take a limited number of cases at a time. I’d so love to help you, but if I’m not the right fit for you and Spot, I would feel better giving this spot to someone I can truly make a difference for.

Quite often clients receiving this message will make a sudden U-turn, insisting that no, you really are the right trainer for them, and committing themselves to follow your lead. This is a good moment to consider an exception to the divorce-not-separation rule, as it’s not uncommon for these clients to become wonderful training partners. Why? Simple: With your confident statement you’ve gained their respect as a professional to be followed.

No, wait. It is you.
When you’re facing a breakup due to dangerous dog behavior, firm, compassionate honesty is the best policy. It’s not in the client’s or dog’s best interest to side-step serious issues. Here’s a sample script for care-giving services like walking and daycare:

This is a difficult conversation but I care very much about you and Lassie and want you both to be safe. I’m concerned about Lassie’s continued [or escalating] [aggression, biting, resource guarding, reactivity, etc.]. Given [the physical set up at our daycare, or the nature of group walks, or the high density area we walk in, etc.] I can’t be certain of avoiding the situations Lassie finds challenging. I’m worried about an incident resulting in a dangerous dog hearing, Lassie being separated from your home, and even your beautiful home at liability risk. I think it will be safer for you and for Lassie to [move to a company that provides individual walks, or stay home until training is completed, etc.].

Notice that even here, when we’re being very forthright about the issue at hand, the script still lays the breakup at the business’ feet by centering the decision to “fire” the dog around the inability to provide the right environment. This compassionate sleight-of-hand seeks to avoid a defensive stance that might keep the client from hearing the real message: This is a dangerous situation.

Trainers, to protect your own liability in situations where clients are not complying with safety management recommendations (and, hopefully, to get the client finally on board), it may be time for the equivalent of the relationship ultimatum: 

This is a difficult conversation but I care very much about you and Lassie and want you both to be safe. I’m concerned about Lassie’s continued [or escalating] [aggression, biting, resource guarding, reactivity, etc.]. I’m worried about an incident resulting in a dangerous dog hearing, Lassie being separated from your home, and even your beautiful home at liability risk. Without a commitment from you to [have Lassie wear her muzzle outside the home, not allow Lassie and the grandchildren to interact, etc.] I am not willing to continue our training work together.

Just as when warning a significant other that her mother’s meddling or his refusal to pick up his dirty socks is about to reach the breaking point, be sure you mean it when you say it. If you aren’t willing to actually end services should a client not respond with positive action, you place yourself (and your client) in a worse position than before the conversation.

The rearview mirror.
The breakup moment is always hard, but just as when ending a romantic relationship that’s come up short, the view from the rearview mirror generally makes up for it. When facing one of these conversations (and yes, they should ideally be in-person conversations, though an emailed breakup is better than no breakup), visualize the relief that’s coming for yourself, any staff, and any other dogs you care for. Then dig deep, take a good breath, and set the client free.

Peer support and business coaching always makes tricky client relationships easier to handle. Take a look at THRIVE! and tackle this areas with confidence.